In 2006 I was working hard and looking forward to graduating with my Honours, Bachelor of Fine Arts. The year had been physically tough for me and I was very tired. I was in the Uvic medical clinic often for this and that. One day as I was working in my studio I put my brush down and went home.

What happened then changed my life. I made it to my couch with what I thought was a bad case of strep throat. A few days later, I called a friend to take me to the emergency department because I couldn’t bear the pain any longer. The next few weeks were a haze. I had been days or hours from dying from cancer. I was put into a helicopter and flown immediately to the Vancouver General Hospital. I spent the next year receiving chemotherapy and a bone marrow transplant from my brother to treat a rare and aggressive form of cancer, Acute Mylogeneous Leukemia. After the transplant I had a 61% chance of surviving.

The treatment was gruelling and felt never ending. Eventually after a year or so I was able to come home. Home meant I still had to travel to Vancouver for follow ups, specialists etc. Chemo and being inside the hospital had a deadening affect on me. I missed the feeling of the breeze on my cheek and grass under my feet. I was robbed of sensations in my body, taste and smell.

But then something happened. After a while I started to come alive.

My body was vulnerable and I experienced bruising over my body that flowered and changed colour like blossoms. I reimagined the colours flourishing over my body. I imagined my new stem cells from my brother as stars, doing their magic in my veins. I wore my striped socks which felt like armour to my battered soul. I also wished for long hair to replace the short stubble I was left with.

And eventually I started painting again. I painted my grief, my sorrow and my gratitude. I painted the joy and the creativity which bloomed from me again.

Moving forward I will be exploring some themes from this time and painting of the figure. A lot of years have passed but I still have the fire in me that fuelled this work.